Growing up I did not have social media or a cell phone that allowed anyone to get a hold of me through texts, social media apps or email any time they wanted. When someone was hurtful to me, I would not feel obligated to hang out with him or her. It was easy to just move on and not have to worry about what they thought or what they were doing. I remember breaking up with a boyfriend and he made one call to a friend asking her why. That was it and we moved on. There were no social media posts for him to see what I was doing. I did not know what he was up to unless we saw each other in person or a friend mentioned something.
Today cell phones, apps, and social media make it difficult to move on because technology has made it so easy for everyone to know everyone’s business. In reality, we should have the right to choose who we let into our lives. Social media has turned that upside down. We should not feel a sense of obligation to have people who have hurt us or who make us uncomfortable watching us on social media. Watching those who have hurt us is not helpful either.
Choosing to press the block option on social media seems to be taboo. We are so worried about offending the person who offended and hurt us that we can’t block them. We allow them to see our lives, to comment on our photos, to text us or message us through apps.
Why is that? It is my right to choose who I let into my life and it is your right too. I have blocked people who have shown me nothing but hurt. If I wouldn’t want to spend time with them face to face because of how they hurt me, why would I want to give them access to my life on social media? Why would anyone feel obligated to allow hurtful people to have access to their social media accounts?
Recently I blocked someone who made me very uncomfortable. My right to keep my life out of his sight on social media, far outweighs his belief that he has the right to know anything about me.
I think it is time we start looking at our cell phones, computers, and all forms of social media in the same way we look at our personal space. We choose how close we let people get to us in regard to our personal space, right? We are given the right to say no to unwanted hugs. We instinctively step back when our personal space is invaded. It’s time we apply the same thinking to all forms of technology. All of us need to understand that we have the right to step back from anyone on social media who makes us feel upset or anxious. It is time we throw out our sense of obligation that we need to be social media friends with them.
You do not have to allow someone who hurt you to watch your Snapchat story. They lost that privilege when they hurt you. Your life on Facebook is none of their business either. It is okay to choose the block option. You do not owe anyone an explanation, just like you don’t owe anyone a reason why you don’t want them in your personal space. Ask yourself today and be honest, who makes you anxious or upset when they are near you personally? If you do not want to be around them, it is a good indication you don’t need them as part of your life through social media. Is there an ex-boyfriend or someone from school who is hurtful to you? If so, do you feel obligated to stay connected with them on Facebook or other forms of social media? If you feel a sense of obligation that is keeping you from blocking someone, please talk to a parent or an adult you can trust. Choosing the block option is okay. As always I would love to hear what you think and feel free to share this.
This was originally written for the Whatever Girls Ministry